Lyla Rae

Introducing our precious little lady...

Lyla Rae

 Monday, April 23, 2012

10:00 am

7 lbs. 7 oz.

20 inches

What a beautiful gift from God! His bountiful blessings have overwhelmed us! I'll be back to post Lyla's birth story in a few days.

Building Up a Marriage: Delight Yourself in the Lord

"Delight yourself in the LORD and He will give you the desires of your heart." -Psalm 37:4

I don't know of a married, Christian woman whose heart doesn't desire to build up a godly marriage. So before we go any further, we must begin with this most crucial aspect of our marriage: Delight yourself in the LORD. In order for us to even have the appropriate desires for our marriage, much less the capability to fulfill those desires, we must first delight in the LORD and His word.

When we truly delight in someone, we don't just keep them in the back of our mind, thinking only occasionally about what may be pleasing to that someone. We don't go about our day, planning whatever may strike our fancy without a thought as to what our "someone" may have in mind. And we don't strike up a conversation only to ask for help in a time of need or shout a quick, gracious comment in a time of joy.

No, when we truly delight in someone, we pursue their time and give them ours. We study that someone and all of their ways, learning what brings them pleasure. We search out new ways for our lives to reflect the love we have for our someone. This is how we should delight in the LORD.

Now, I'll be the first to admit that it can be difficult to "find time" to sit down and read the word of God and "take time" to pray when I'm running low on sleep, I only have 20 minutes until my 17-month-old wakes up (maybe less than 20 minutes before my newborn is ready to nurse), and last night's dishes are still in the sink, toddler-sized portions of yesterday's meal scattered on the kitchen floor, last-weekend's laundry waiting to be washed, and tonight's supper ready to be cooked. But, when we realize that the time we have is graciously given to us by the Lord, it makes it much easier to prioritize Him above the mess, and suddenly we aren't merely finding time to be with Him, we're consciously seeking time.

Delighting in God and His word is the beginning of building up our homes and marriages for Him. Knowing that it is the wise woman who builds her house, and the foolish woman who tears it down with her own hands (Proverbs 14:1), and knowing that the fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction (Proverbs 1:7), we clearly see that it is through His instruction that God makes us wise. When we daily seek Him and read His word, the Lord pours wisdom into the pool of our hearts until it overflows, and bubbles out through the brooks in our lives, giving life and beauty and peace. When we don't seek the Lord and His word however, the pool of our heart becomes little more than a stagnant puddle of good intentions.

As we read through the Bible, the Lord uses His word to convict and sanctify us in various aspects of our lives. And the beauty that results from this sanctification flows through the brooks, and into the larger stream that is marriage, all the while seeking the ultimate destination: the ocean that is glorifying God.

It can be assumed that nearly all who read this desire to build up their house for God, therefore must delight in God, and seek to become wise through the word of God. As we work to build a thriving marriage may we always remember this crucial principal: to delight in the LORD and strive to bring glory to His name.

Building Up My Marriage

Yesterday marked my 37th week of pregnancy and the Man of My Dreams and I realized that I have been pregnant for over half of our marriage and either pregnant or breastfeeding for all but 3 months! This got me thinking about all of the warnings we were given about how children (especially infants and toddlers) add so much stress to a marriage.
"Oh just wait...once this baby comes you won't have any time for intimacy."
"Even if you do have time for intimacy, you won't have the energy!"
"Ha! Forget the home-cooked meals when you're wife's chasing after kids!"
"Once you have kids, your freedom is out the window."
"Why are you having kids so soon? Aren't there things you want to do?"
...and this doesn't even include the You're-crazy looks we get when we mention that our view of marriage includes my husband being the leader of the family and me being under submission to him, raising our children to hold these same views.
But the wonderful thing is, by God's grace, I really feel that our marriage is flourishing. I can honestly say that I see something new to love in my husband almost every day, whether it's something he says, or does, or even something he doesn't say. And I think that many times, the Lord uses our children to draw my attention to these details of my husband. While there are definitely tough days when I seem to forget that self-control is a fruit of the Spirit, and rough nights when in a sleepless fog patience is scarce, we grow in our love for one another constantly. Amazingly, we do still have time (and usually energy) for consistent intimacy. We still have home-cooked meals most days. Nothing can take away the most important freedom we have: freedom that is rooted in Christ, freedom from the punishment for our sin. We have a whole list of things we want to experience and our children can be included in nearly all of these. And having children has given my husband new opportunities to exercise leadership and me new opportunities to submit myself to him, further reflecting the church's relationship to Christ.
As the delivery of our second child nears, I want to keep record of many biblical practices within my marriage that help me to build up my house as the wise woman of Proverbs 14:1. It is not that I am an expert of any sort, but rather I want to keep record of the the principals the Lord is teaching me through His word, so I may look back on them, even on the most difficult of days, and be reminded of the many ways He has blessed my marriage and sanctified me. I pray that these principals may be an encouragement to your marriage, as well.

I am a: Life-Giver

"Blessed is everyone who fears the LORD, who walks in his ways! You shall eat the fruit of the labor of your hands; you shall be blessed, and it shall be well with you. Your wife will be like a fruitful vine within your house; your children will be like olive shoots around your table. Behold, thus shall the man be blessed who fears the LORD." -Psalm 128:1-4

Today, I'm 35 weeks pregnant, so this facet of my role as wife and mother is ever so dear to my heart. As excited as I am to be giving birth to a sweet baby girl, I don't ponder often enough the significance of God using my body as a vessel, a fruitful vine, to bring forth a brand new life into this world. And not only to birth into these surroundings, but a life to shape, train, nurture, and love. A life to raise in the fear and admonition of the LORD. A life that, I pray, will bring glory to God and magnify His holy name.

What a magnificent responsibility we have as mothers to freely allow God the use of our bodies and lives through pregnancy (if He has designed us to be fertile) and motherhood. And, oh, what a gift! Throughout both of my pregnancies I have been amazed at this baby inside of me being grown and sustained by the Lord, knitted together in my womb. In my life, few things have matched the indescribable joy that comes with that positive pregnancy test and the complete love that I feel for someone I've yet to meet. Each day I feel closer and closer to this beautiful life, as my bump emerges, as I hear the reassuring thump, thump of the heartbeat, as I see the reality of what is inside of me moving around like a jumping jelly bean on the ultrasound screen, as I feel those first bubbly movements, and as I feel those not-so-subtle jabs from a little one who is filling me up until I'm nearly sure there's no more room to grow. Yes, that full love grows and grows, filling me up until it matches my belly, which looks like it's about to burst. And you'd think that love would pique in those first overwhelming moments as this life, which has been knit together in secret, makes a grand appearance and is placed on my chest to nurse and coddle and love. But it just continues to grow deeper and stronger day after day after day.

It's a miracle and I am so thankful that I have a front row seat to view the Creator's handiwork! Yes, what a gift indeed, to be used by the King to bring forth life and raise a generation for His kingdom! Let us not forget that each and every life we bring into this world is a blessing, a reward, a reason to praise the LORD!

"Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them!" -Psalm 127:3-5a

I Am A...Guardian

Ditching the Dish and Directing TV in Our Home

In Titus 2:5 Paul admonishes women to be "keepers at home." I have found that the word "keeper" in this passage comes from the Greek word "oikouros." "Oikouros" is a compound word derived from the words "oikos" meaning home, household, family, and "ouros" meaning guard, guardian, watcher. This gives me a fuller understanding of all that it means to be a keeper of the home. I am not only to work at home, being a homemaker; I am also to be my family's guardian, standing as a tightly woven sieve, filtering through all that enters my home.

As a mother, I am with my child (soon to be children) nearly every hour of the day. Since I am a mother to little ones, it is quite simple to guard them from most negative outside influences. I choose where they go, who watches them and when, and I am able to screen what comes into the home. However, one way that negative and unbiblical influences can seep in without notice is through television...yes even those "sweet, harmless" children's shows.

In our home, TV is already a minimal part of our day. And I realize that in many homes the TV becomes little more than a humdrum of background noise. But even then, I believe our children pick up on many negatives that shows (and commercials) have to offer. When sassy, disrespectful tones, boisterous women exposing too much skin, and men playing the part of the fool become part of what is poured into our children's minds and hearts throughout the day, how can we expect these thoughts, words, and actions not to spring forth out of them?
For the past two years our family has used satellite TV. And while there are some clean, educational shows the channels have to offer, it is difficult to constantly sift through them, allowing what is edifying and purging what is not. As my husband and I discussed the use of television in our home, we realized that as our children grow older, it would only become more difficult to monitor the shows and content to which they were being exposed.

I also know my weakness to sit down after lunch and enjoy an hour (or more, I hate to admit) of "A Baby Story" and similar shows. This clearly distracts me from being diligent to complete tasks around the house and robs me of time I could have used more wisely. Along with that is the temptation to be drawn into a show that is anything but biblical and uplifting as I scan through the channels.

Because of these and other reasons, my husband and I decided to do something radical...Well, by today's standards, at least! We decided to get rid of our satellite TV service! Shocking, I know! :) And may I say that I am actually excited! The temptation to waste time in front of the television will basically be removed. Staring at a screen will no longer be considered "spending time together" or "family time." I will be kindly forced to creatively set up ways to keep my children involved while I'm busy about the laundry or cooking, which will be much better for them in the long run. Yes, I am very excited indeed!

We may invest in Netflix or Redbox, or something of the like. This will allow us to more closely monitor what is coming into our home, and thus, our minds. This will also give our children opportunities to practice self-control with regards to what they choose to watch as they grow older. (Which is much more easily done while choosing a movie through these methods rather than stumbling across a show which entices the flesh and then having to resist.) Another tool we plan on taking advantage of is Plugged In Online. On this website, we can look up and teach our children (at older ages) to look up a Christian review of many movies before even renting them.

Hopefully this transition will go smoothly. I should probably prepare myself for some withdrawal symptoms from not seeing "A Baby Story" and possibly some balking from my hubby during the World Series and NFL Playoffs! Overall my husband and I are ready to ditch the Dish and really start directing our TV.

How about you? What are methods you use to guard your family from negative television influences?

Jessica

Who Am I?

In the back of my December 2011 issue of Above Rubies, I saw an advertisement for a Nancy Campbell teaching DVD titled "Who Am I?" The answer to the proposed question fascinated me as I thought of the many responsibilities and blessings that encompass my title of "Stay at Home Mom."

"I am a....

Nurturer

Life-giver

Leader

Generation Builder

Manager of my Home

Feeder

Educator

Teacher

Child Trainer

Discipler

Guardian

Flourishing Vine"

...and may I add...

Help Meet

I love this list! It makes me take a step back and realize how important my role truly is. It also makes me question: Am I doing all that I can to fulfill each of these aspects of motherhood?

Over the next several weeks I will try to post about each of these biblical traits.

New Home and New Baby (Preparation Phase)

Butterflies are fluttering in my stomach today, as the realization of buying our new house is sinking in! We have had a wonderful 6 months living with my family, but my husband and I are so excited to return to a domain of our own and to transform a new house into a delightful home for our growing family!

The home is beautiful and move-in ready, but I love adding a little personal touch, so in just a few short weeks we'll be painting. I love putting soft, bright colors on the walls and watching a room transform! But, this time, I suppose, I'll have to remove myself from the fumes, leave the painting up to my family and friends and just enjoy the end result. These are my doctor's orders and I'm sure our sweet little bundle of joy will be greatful!

And speaking of that sweet little bundle, I'm getting all of my thoughts together for her bedroom. I purchased a lovely cottage chic bedding set, found a small vintage lamp in my in-laws' basement that will be a perfect match, and am gathering many other ideas on Pinterest! There is just something so creatively exhillerating about decorating a room for a daughter. Now, that's not to say I'm not excited about Levi's Big-Boy Room! The airplane theme is in the works. I was inspired by the (somewhat large) model airplane my husband built when he was younger. It's red and white and will be hanging from the ceiling. Levi's new, handed-down twin bed will be painted red for a punch of color and will be complete with vintage airplane sheets that his nana found on sale at a discount store. I am getting so antsy about decorating not only the children's rooms, but the entire house, including creating a haven of delight in our master bedroom! (I feel like my nesting urges are kicking in early!)

I'm overjoyed to be a mommy to a baby girl (Lyla, due May 1) and a baby boy (Levi, who will be about 17 months old at the arrival of his sister)! This pregnancy is passing by very quickly, so I'm already trying to prepare myself for the crazy/sweet first few weeks with a newborn.

This time, since I'll also be caring for Levi, I know I'll have to be very diligent to stay organized. I've created a ten week menu plan, complete with a grocery list that corresponds to each week's menu plan recipes. (I'm hoping to post more on this menu plan later.) Each week I have included a meal to freeze, in hopes that I will have stocked a little over a week's worth of meals by the time Lyla arrives. Also, by contiuing to freeze meals weekly, I'll have a back up for those future days with two littles, that are just too hectic for cooking.

One more thing I'm trying investigate: Ways to keep my 17 month old entertained while nursing my newborn...especially for those first couple of weeks when nursing sessions tend to last longer. I would appreciate ANY tips you have! What has worked in your experience?

Jessica