Meditating on the Cross

Sometimes when I read God's word, I feel overwhelmed with love and encouragement. Other times I'm struck with conviction that burns in my gut. Just when I think I am reading too deeply into a passage, or I am more concerned with man's judgement than that of my Father, the Lord faithfully shows me the weaknesses in my heart.

My flesh is far too easily swayed by this sinful world in which we live. The enemy cleverly and craftily uses the culture to seduce me into believing there is no black and white, only grey. That lie would be easy to swallow if it weren't for God's Word.

There is a delicate balance between being in the world but not of the world; loving my neighbor without shrouding that love in social tolerance. My heart's greatest desire is to love my Lord through obedience to His Word. Many times He draws out of me a love so deeply laden with passion and zeal for His testimonies, and I struggle to contain it. I pray that living out the love I have for my Savior, however pathetic my attemps, brings Him glory and draws others to Him. But there is still a longing to speak truth in love to my sons and daughters, brothers and sisters in Christ, as well as the lost. However, I know my words must come from a humble heart, and sometimes my passion and zeal begin to override humility. I am so grateful that Jesus is my navigator through these mine fields. If I continue to trust His sovereign voice, He will be able to use me in ways I am not able to foresee.

As I seek to daily die to self and live for Christ, the Holy Spirit empowers me to fight the battle that rages on within my flesh. The battle that tells me to keep silent; to speak an unfit word; to fear persecution; to fear being labeled judgemental and legalistic. But, Praise be to God for the encouragement and strength that only comes from Him. He provided the remedy to the disease of this world, the way to overcome sin. Jesus died on the cross, rose from the grave, took His place in Heaven and draws us, His followers, away from the world's allure and into His arms.

Sinful man lives in a corrupt world rescued by a perfect Savior. That is what I must keep in perspective. That is what must motivate my heart into action. C.J. Mahaney beautifully draws the scope of this issue into focus in this excerpt from the book Worldliness, "Meditate on the cross. Consider the wonders of the Savior who died for sinners and rose victorious over sin and death. Dwell where the cries of Clavary are louder than the clamor of the world."

To Whom are We Submitting - Part 2

Ignoring the blessings in life on a day like this seems impossible. I am sitting in front of my computer, but just inches beyond that I see a white rocking chair beckoning me to enjoy this spring day. Its gentle nod assures me that my senses will be filled with a warm breeze, bird’s song, swaying branches and fragrant blossoms. My thoughts flash back to a year ago, and years before that, when I was sitting at a desk in a room with no windows. Every spare moment was spent making lists: lists to remind myself of things to discuss with my husband and children; lists of things to do at home every evening and weekend. I daydreamed about cleaning ceiling fans, organizing closets, grocery shopping, tilling the garden, planting flowers, and of course that was all followed by looming fretfulness. Not only did I wonder when and how I would get it all accomplished, I wondered how I would share any quality time with my family…and my Savior. A quick prayer here and there, and a peek at scripture over lunch was a shameful attempt at showing love for my Lord.

I had ventured off the path. Yes, I kept it in sight, but I wasn’t traveling the trail blazed specifically for me as a child of God, wife, and mother. In my heart, I knew I was not honoring God, therefore, I was dishonoring Him (it seems so obvious now!). It wasn’t that I felt the need to work outside the home. I thought it was a contribution to my family. It’s what is expected of a 21st century woman. It took me a while to fully accept that I was contributing to my family according to the world’s standards, not God’s. Thankfully, He left my spirit unsettled. He also led my husband and me to some wonderful people whom believe fully in God’s inerrant word. They illuminated scriptures we had read many times before, but didn’t accept at face value, specifically Titus 2:3-5.

“Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored. “

Those words stung me! ”workers at home”…”subject to their own husbands”…”the word of God will not be dishonored” The words of the Almighty burned my heart with an undeniable conviction which produced a pliable lump of clay for Him to continue shaping. The Holy Spirit was speaking to me. He had been speaking to me for quite some time, but I wasn’t listening to Him. There is a difference between hearing something and listening. I hear many sounds, but until I deliberately listen I do not know what they are. My husband can say something to me. I hear him, but if I am distracted and not listening I don’t know what he is trying to say. Listening to the Lord requires putting aside the distractions in our lives and focusing on Him, only Him. I was allowing a film to develop on the windows of my heart and mind. Light could shine through, but it certainly was not clear.

Understand that I take full responsibility for my rebellion against God’s Word. But what I am about to say is crucial. This struggle with working outside the home went on for years. I spoke to many other Christians (and cried to some) about my unsettled feelings regarding working outside the home. I was very open about my concern with disobedience toward God. Repeatedly, I was assured that the Lord was in no way pleased or displeased with my choice of lifestyle. In fact, I was encouraged to remain working because I could impact so many other lives through my position in a public school. Depending far too much on others’ interpretation of Scripture, as well as my own sinful pride, I did not allow the Holy Spirit full reign in my heart to disclose the truth to me. This is an area in which I would urge anyone to be extremely cautious. Be ever so sensitive to convictions the Lord impresses on the heart; whether it be yours or someone else’s.

Liberty comes through the Spirit of the Lord. However, I am not to abuse that liberty for selfish fulfillment. Excuses can always be conjured up to justify our choices to keep one foot on the path while we deliberately let the other trail through the weeds. Counsel from others often feels good to the flesh, but not the spirit. However, discernment is vital in this human state. God’s Word in inerrant; it is the standard for our lives. He has presented the quintessence for which I am to strive as a godly woman. My testimony is exposed in how much of myself I am willing to relinquish to His will. Even the unbeliever can recognize when a professing Christian woman is not submissive to God’s Word or her husband. My unwillingness to submit can prove a stumbling block to my sisters in Christ. Pure scriptural truth must be illuminated if any of us are to practice full capitulation in sincere love and obedience.

Tranquility lies in a submissive heart. Blessings pour into marriages and families living to glorify the living God. Be encouraged…our Creator designed us, as women, for a specific purpose. Trust in His precepts.

To Whom are We Submitting - Part 1

God’s creation sings His song for all to hear. How is it that we are prone to miss the music? Are our minds so cluttered with a constant buzz preventing His message from penetrating our hearts? We are presented with plenty of options to fill our time and thoughts, but not all are of any true worth. Options require a choice. Often, it is those very things we choose that crowd out what is most important. The world tells us how our time should be spent if it is to have value. However, the world contradicts what God says. We cannot serve two masters. No matter how we justify our choices, make excuses for our busy schedules, or defend our lack of attentiveness toward our husbands and children, too often our circumstances are of our own making.

Are we seeking the Lord’s will in the major decisions, as well as the details of our lives? Even the most trivial aspects (in our opinion) belong to Him. We profess to pray for His will to be done in our lives, but are we willing to follow when He answers in black and white on the pages of scripture? I see so many women working outside of the home, filling up their time with a career. Then they add another function, even a worthy ministry, to their already busy schedules. Add in their husband and children, and their time and energy are spent. Actually, it is usually the husband and children that get the tail end of their time and energy. Their goals may be well meaning, but the outcome is of little quality. Most importantly, do these goals we have set line up with what God has called us to do? If we are completely honest with ourselves, the answer will most likely be no. Through His wisdom and mercy, the Lord very clearly defines the role of a godly woman. It is our pride and selfish ambition that casts a fog over His words, along with swallowing the lie the world has fed us. I look around at women adding to their plate trying to feel full, but overwhelmed with stress because, in actuality, there is no more room on their plate. At the end of the day, the grumbling of stress is there, but they still find themselves empty. They cannot be full, truly full, outside of God’s will.

The majority of my adult life has been spent giving the “best” part of my day to those beyond my domain. My heart’s desire has always been to be home where I am available to my husband and children. But, in all my early years I was told that was not an acceptable path to travel. True success, I was told, comes from going to college, getting a job, spending money on material things, having a family (not managing it – others would help me do that), and balancing all of these facets for the world to see. I was fed the lie, and I swallowed it. But it left me feeling empty.

Then the Lord revealed to me why the vacancy in my heart remained. I was following what the world said, not my Creator. He put such a strong conviction in my heart to be obedient to His word. It was a transition that took much prayer from me and for me, but the blessings He has showered on my family and me through our submission are immeasurable. Our lifestyle has slightly shifted and sacrifices have been made, but those things are miniscule in comparison to the contentment found in walking the path He set before us.

My choices impact each member of my household. I want my family to know I treasure them above all other earthly blessings. I want my husband to know I love, honor, and respect his leadership. I want the Lord to use me to cast a light across the deceptions of the world so my children can carry that light with them. I want the King of kings to be glorified through joyful service in my domain.

We grow closer to the Lord when we fully trust Him in all our ways, leaning not on our own understanding, acknowledging Him in all we do, and allowing Him to direct our paths (Proverbs 3:5-6). There is no better place to be than within the boundaries set by our Creator. It is there that His song penetrates our hearts with the fullness only He can sing into us.

Kristina

The True Wife Part III

"Every true wife makes her husband's interests her own. While he lives for her, carrying her image in his heart and toiling for her all the days, she thinks only of what will do him good. when burdens press upon him she tries to lighten them by sympathy, by cheer, by the inspiration of love. She enters with zest and enthusiasm into all his plans. She is never a weight to drag him down; she is strength in his heart to help him ever to do nobler and better things."

JR Miller

As a new wife, there are many things I am still learning about my husband. As I mentioned in my first post, my continual goal is to write down things that I know my husband appreciates and try my best to always do those things for him. For instance, I discovered that my husband thoroughly enjoys a cold glass of freshly brewed iced tea. And although I haven't the slightest craving for tea, it is my aim to please my husband by preparing and serving it to his delight. I also learned that my husband feels great satisfaction when we work together on projects, namely projects that take place in the garage. It can be a bit tempting to brush off this desire of his when I know that a multitude of my own projects await me within the walls of our house. But then I remind myself that helping my husband is what I was made to do. If brewing him tea helps meet his needs, then I will brew. If postponing a household task helps meet his needs, then I will postpone. After all, I was created to be his help meet, to help meet his needs.

It is an awesome realization to know that I alone am the woman that God created to be my husbands helper, that He created in me attributes that no other woman can offer my dearest. It is my calling and responsibility to apply these God-given traits to my marriage, thus becoming strength in my husband's heart and helping him ever do nobler and better things. And how blessed I am to have a husband who values my opinions, compliments my strengths, forgives my weaknesses, appreciates my seemingly insignificant tasks, and invites my flawed, inexpert help. What a marvelous man is mine! May I never be a weight to drag him down.

The True Wife: Part I

"The true wife clings and leans, but she also helps and inspires. Her husband feels the mighty inspiration of her love in all his life. Toil is easier, burdens are lighter, and battles are less fierce because of the face that waits in the quiet of the home, because of the heart that beats in loving sympathy, because of the voice that speaks its words of cheer and encouragement when the day's work is done." -JR Miller


As a wife it is so important to focus on truly helping and inspiring my husband. Do I truly make his toil easier, his burdens lighter, and his battles less fierce? It is my goal to begin a journal, writing down all the actions I know my husband appreciates. Whether it be getting the mail every day or greeting him at the door with a kiss when he comes home from work, I want to remember all of the seemingly small, but vastly important things for the future and start now habits that will please him forever. By the grace of God, I pray that as the years of my new marriage come to pass, I will become more and more sensitive to my husband's needs and make my home a place of true comfort, peace, joy, and love; a haven of rest for my dearest.

Jessica