Monday, June 14, 2010

A Beautiful Trip Around the Sun


I thought about my life today and how quickly everything has changed. Just last summer I had gotten engaged to a wonderful man, was busy planning a beautiful wedding, and only dreaming of and praying for what God might bring me in my married life. Fast forward twelve months to today. I have been married for almost seven months (to a wonderful man), I am sixteen weeks pregnant with a beautiful baby, and only dreaming of and praying for what God might do through this child's life. I am so thankful for this gift and will sing continuous praise to the One who not only gives life on this earth, but life for eternity.

Jessica

Monday, April 19, 2010

To Whom are We Submitting - Part 2


Ignoring the blessings in life on a day like this seems impossible. I am sitting in front of my computer, but just inches beyond that I see a white rocking chair beckoning me to enjoy this spring day. Its gentle nod assures me that my senses will be filled with a warm breeze, bird’s song, swaying branches and fragrant blossoms. My thoughts flash back to a year ago, and years before that, when I was sitting at a desk in a room with no windows. Every spare moment was spent making lists: lists to remind myself of things to discuss with my husband and children; lists of things to do at home every evening and weekend. I daydreamed about cleaning ceiling fans, organizing closets, grocery shopping, tilling the garden, planting flowers, and of course that was all followed by looming fretfulness. Not only did I wonder when and how I would get it all accomplished, I wondered how I would share any quality time with my family…and my Savior. A quick prayer here and there, and a peek at scripture over lunch was a shameful attempt at showing love for my Lord.

I had ventured off the path. Yes, I kept it in sight, but I wasn’t traveling the trail blazed specifically for me as a child of God, wife, and mother. In my heart, I knew I was not honoring God, therefore, I was dishonoring Him (it seems so obvious now!). It wasn’t that I felt the need to work outside the home. I thought it was a contribution to my family. It’s what is expected of a 21st century woman. It took me a while to fully accept that I was contributing to my family according to the world’s standards, not God’s. Thankfully, He left my spirit unsettled. He also led my husband and me to some wonderful people whom believe fully in God’s inerrant word. They illuminated scriptures we had read many times before, but didn’t accept at face value, specifically Titus 2:3-5.

“Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored. “

Those words stung me! ”workers at home”…”subject to their own husbands”…”the word of God will not be dishonored” The words of the Almighty burned my heart with an undeniable conviction which produced a pliable lump of clay for Him to continue shaping. The Holy Spirit was speaking to me. He had been speaking to me for quite some time, but I wasn’t listening to Him. There is a difference between hearing something and listening. I hear many sounds, but until I deliberately listen I do not know what they are. My husband can say something to me. I hear him, but if I am distracted and not listening I don’t know what he is trying to say. Listening to the Lord requires putting aside the distractions in our lives and focusing on Him, only Him. I was allowing a film to develop on the windows of my heart and mind. Light could shine through, but it certainly was not clear.

Understand that I take full responsibility for my rebellion against God’s Word. But what I am about to say is crucial. This struggle with working outside the home went on for years. I spoke to many other Christians (and cried to some) about my unsettled feelings regarding working outside the home. I was very open about my concern with disobedience toward God. Repeatedly, I was assured that the Lord was in no way pleased or displeased with my choice of lifestyle. In fact, I was encouraged to remain working because I could impact so many other lives through my position in a public school. Depending far too much on others’ interpretation of Scripture, as well as my own sinful pride, I did not allow the Holy Spirit full reign in my heart to disclose the truth to me. This is an area in which I would urge anyone to be extremely cautious. Be ever so sensitive to convictions the Lord impresses on the heart; whether it be yours or someone else’s.

Liberty comes through the Spirit of the Lord. However, I am not to abuse that liberty for selfish fulfillment. Excuses can always be conjured up to justify our choices to keep one foot on the path while we deliberately let the other trail through the weeds. Counsel from others often feels good to the flesh, but not the spirit. However, discernment is vital in this human state. God’s Word in inerrant; it is the standard for our lives. He has presented the quintessence for which I am to strive as a godly woman. My testimony is exposed in how much of myself I am willing to relinquish to His will. Even the unbeliever can recognize when a professing Christian woman is not submissive to God’s Word or her husband. My unwillingness to submit can prove a stumbling block to my sisters in Christ. Pure scriptural truth must be illuminated if any of us are to practice full capitulation in sincere love and obedience.

Tranquility lies in a submissive heart. Blessings pour into marriages and families living to glorify the living God. Be encouraged…our Creator designed us, as women, for a specific purpose. Trust in His precepts.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Springtime and New Life


"For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother's womb. I will praise You for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from You, when I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, The days fashioned for me, When as yet there were none of them. How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How great is the sum of them! If I should count them, they would be more in number than the sand." -Psalm 139:13-18
At the precise moment that my heart was yearning to see those beautiful buds on the trees, Cherry Blossom blooms, and all other signs of new life that come to my Midwestern home in the springtime, the Lord placed in me a sign of new life incomparable to any other. On March 23rd I discovered that God had been secretly forming a child in my womb, seeing his (or her) substance, being yet unformed, and fashioning his days, when as yet there were none.
How thankful I am to my God for giving me this gift, this miracle. I pray that this baby is formed into a strong, healthy, newborn babe who will be placed in my arms to nurse and coddle to my heart's content. I also pray as Jeremiah 1:5 says, that even before my child is born, he is sanctified, set apart for a holy purpose. How delighted I am to have this new life growing inside of me, being sustained and nurtured by my own body and by the immeasurable love of my Lord. Marvelous are His works; I will praise His beautiful name!
~Jessica

Monday, March 22, 2010

My Content Heart was Born in the Kitchen




"...for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content." -Philippians 4:11

"Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have."
-Hebrews 13:5

"A little that a righteous man has is better than the riches of many wicked." -Psalm 37:16

"Now godliness with contentment is great gain." -1 Timothy 6:6

About six months before my husband and I began our life together as man and wife, he began preparing for our future by tearing apart the house he purchased. I mean literally, tearing apart, plaster, lathe, ceilings, floors, everything, down to the studs. All that was left of our future home was a skeleton and, of course, endless possibilities (at least as many as our budget would allow). My wonderful, creative, engineer, husband, reworked the whole layout of our quaint, 1904 farmhouse and opened up the floor plan beautifully! The master bedroom became the living room; the large living room became a bathroom and a second bedroom; the second bedroom became the kitchen, the kitchen became the master bedroom; and the laundry room became the master bathroom/closet. The only room in our whole house that remained in its original location was the dining room, and even it was modified.


Now that the background of our undertaking has been revealed, it may come as no surprise that "Mission Home" is not presently complete. Our house is quite livable, however and is even filled with many amenities that have only been seen as "necessary" in my own naive generation. But there was one aspect of the house, that before the wedding, I thought would not be near completion, and I would terribly long for- a kitchen. You see, I love to cook and I love to be in the kitchen, so knowing that I may not have an oven or a sink or a refrigerator or kitchen cabinets or a microwave for at least a year was somewhat disappointing, actually quite disappointing. No home cooked meals to eat with my hubby? No baking bread? No experimenting with new recipes? No kitchen? But still, I made the decision to be content with what I was given.


Our current kitchen setup


Well, we serve a God who cares for every aspect of our lives, and do you know what He did? He provided. Maybe not in any ways we may have anticipated, but the Lord provided all the same. A month before we were married, my husband attended a cabinet auction and brought home two cabinets (for five dollars a piece) that we were able to set up in the corner of our kitchen. Not long after that, a pastor friend and his wife told us that they were preparing to sell a large refrigerator, two pantry cabinets, and a counter top at a very affordable price. So in went the refrigerator, the pantry, and the counter top. A few weeks after the wedding, we bought (an extremely discounted) brand new, gas stove. It came out of a home my father-in-law had sold to an elderly lady who preferred to cook with an electric stove. This may have been the most exciting addition to our kitchen! Now we had everything except a kitchen sink, so we washed our dishes in the laundry tub that was serving as our bathroom sink until we could afford a "real" bathroom sink. When we did save up to by the "real" sink, we were able to move the laundry tub to the kitchen. Not only did we acquire all of this, but for Christmas, my husband's sisters gave us a microwave. Our kitchen had actually become a kitchen! Everything seemed so complete and I was so satisfied! So imagine my excitement a week ago when a friend of the family gave my husband and I cabinets and counter tops and when my husband's co-worker gave us a real kitchen sink! We were able to use two of the cabinets and the counter top (which had the perfect sized rectangular cutout) to set up our sink!


The new sink and cabinets


Do we have the perfect, Country Living, Better Homes and Gardens kitchen? No. But we do have a stove which allows me to prepare my husband's favorite foods, a refrigerator to store the ingredients and leftovers, counter tops on which to work (and experiment), a wonderful sink where I can clean up my messes, and plenty of space to store all of our dishes! It is perfect for us because it is what God provided! I will be fully satisfied with it because what the Lord has given us has magnified His name and demonstrated His love and power. In His awesome provision, God even made sure to provide the newest extra cabinets, leaving unused space for me to store the baby bottles that I just found out I will be needing in about nine months! Yes, we serve a very knowing, powerful, present, loving God!
~Jessica

Monday, March 15, 2010

To Whom are We Submitting - Part 1


God’s creation sings His song for all to hear. How is it that we are prone to miss the music? Are our minds so cluttered with a constant buzz preventing His message from penetrating our hearts? We are presented with plenty of options to fill our time and thoughts, but not all are of any true worth. Options require a choice. Often, it is those very things we choose that crowd out what is most important. The world tells us how our time should be spent if it is to have value. However, the world contradicts what God says. We cannot serve two masters. No matter how we justify our choices, make excuses for our busy schedules, or defend our lack of attentiveness toward our husbands and children, too often our circumstances are of our own making.

Are we seeking the Lord’s will in the major decisions, as well as the details of our lives? Even the most trivial aspects (in our opinion) belong to Him. We profess to pray for His will to be done in our lives, but are we willing to follow when He answers in black and white on the pages of scripture? I see so many women working outside of the home, filling up their time with a career. Then they add another function, even a worthy ministry, to their already busy schedules. Add in their husband and children, and their time and energy are spent. Actually, it is usually the husband and children that get the tail end of their time and energy. Their goals may be well meaning, but the outcome is of little quality. Most importantly, do these goals we have set line up with what God has called us to do? If we are completely honest with ourselves, the answer will most likely be no. Through His wisdom and mercy, the Lord very clearly defines the role of a godly woman. It is our pride and selfish ambition that casts a fog over His words, along with swallowing the lie the world has fed us. I look around at women adding to their plate trying to feel full, but overwhelmed with stress because, in actuality, there is no more room on their plate. At the end of the day, the grumbling of stress is there, but they still find themselves empty. They cannot be full, truly full, outside of God’s will.

The majority of my adult life has been spent giving the “best” part of my day to those beyond my domain. My heart’s desire has always been to be home where I am available to my husband and children. But, in all my early years I was told that was not an acceptable path to travel. True success, I was told, comes from going to college, getting a job, spending money on material things, having a family (not managing it – others would help me do that), and balancing all of these facets for the world to see. I was fed the lie, and I swallowed it. But it left me feeling empty.

Then the Lord revealed to me why the vacancy in my heart remained. I was following what the world said, not my Creator. He put such a strong conviction in my heart to be obedient to His word. It was a transition that took much prayer from me and for me, but the blessings He has showered on my family and me through our submission are immeasurable. Our lifestyle has slightly shifted and sacrifices have been made, but those things are miniscule in comparison to the contentment found in walking the path He set before us.

My choices impact each member of my household. I want my family to know I treasure them above all other earthly blessings. I want my husband to know I love, honor, and respect his leadership. I want the Lord to use me to cast a light across the deceptions of the world so my children can carry that light with them. I want the King of kings to be glorified through joyful service in my domain.

We grow closer to the Lord when we fully trust Him in all our ways, leaning not on our own understanding, acknowledging Him in all we do, and allowing Him to direct our paths (Proverbs 3:5-6). There is no better place to be than within the boundaries set by our Creator. It is there that His song penetrates our hearts with the fullness only He can sing into us.



Kristina

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Gentleness


Gentleness – calm, kind, loving, patient, amiable. This is the wife and mother I strive to be. Not lacking spirit, only lacking anger, bitterness, and exasperation. The Word clearly tells us:

“Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel—rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.”1 Peter 3:3-4

My husband and children are precious gifts from the Lord. What a wonderful opportunity to serve my Savior. It is my desire to use my relationships with them as a crucible. I pray that the Lord would refine my heart; polish it to reflect His love.
Kristina

Monday, March 8, 2010

Every Wife's First Duty


"That they may teach the younger women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed." -Titus 2:4-5


"In one of his Epistles St. Paul gives the counsel that young wives should be 'workers at home,' signifying that home is the sphere of the wife's duties, and that she is to find her chief work there.

There is widest opportunity in the most fitting service for every woman whose heart God has touched to be a ministering angel to those who need sympathy or help. There are many who are free to serve in public charities, in caring for the poor, for the sick..., for the orphaned and the aged...

But it should be understood that for every wife the first duty is the making and keeping of her own home. Her first and best work should be done there, and till it is well done she has no right to go outside to take up other duties. She is to be a 'worker at home.' She must look upon her home as the one spot on earth for which she alone is responsible and which she must cultivate well for God if she never does anything outside. For her the Father's business is not attending... missionary meetings, and mothers' meetings, ...or even teaching a Sunday-school class, until she has made her own home all that her wisest thought and best skill can make it. There have been wives who in their zeal for Christ's work outside have neglected Christ's work inside their own doors. They have had eyes and hearts for human need and human sorrow in the broad fields lying far out, but neither eye nor heart for the work of love lain about their own feet. The result has been...that while they were winning a place in the hearts of the poor or the sick or the orphan, they were losing their rightful place in the hearts of their own household. Let it be remembered that Christ's work in the home is the first that He gives to every wife, and that no amount of consecrated activities in other spheres will atone in this world or the next for neglect or failure there." -JR Miller


After I read this passage in JR Miller's THE FAMILY, I was overwhelmed, to be honest. It caused me to reevaluate myself and my definition of "a keeper at home." You see, being a keeper at home is more than just keeping a good house, as the Message translation would have us believe. Are clean floors and tidy rooms a part of the equation? Of course. But being a keeper of the home is so much more that that. It is serving my husband, promoting peaceful attitudes, making sure that every facet of my family's living is cared for. It is guarding with a tightly woven filter all that enters the door. It is turning my home, in every aspect, into an atmosphere where Christ's love is expressed to the extent that His aroma spills through every crack and crevice of my home.

To accomplish these tasks and be a "keeper at home," I must first and foremost be at home. If God said that my life's work was to create for Him a beautiful painting, would I only work on it in the evenings after I came home from my "real" job, or on the weekends when my schedule was not so busy? Would I place my painting in another's hands, trusting that they could fulfill God's desire for me to complete it? Of course not! I would pour every ounce of my being into that painting. If the skill did not come easily to me, I would study and practice. I would be ever searching the painting for some flaw to correct, some detail to make it all the more beautiful. I would never stop trying to perfect the painting I was making for my King; it would be my life's work.
But God, in His infinite wisdom did not create me to be a painter, He created my to be a keeper at home. I realize that I cannot realistically spend every waking hour within the walls of my house, but I also realize that I must commit the majority (the first and best) of my time, thought, energy, skill and work to my home and the family therein.

Keeping my home is at the core of my being. How could it not be when it is the first work the Lord gives to every wife? If I forsake my duty as a homemaker by committing my first and best to other noble works, I forsake the very path that the Creator has purposefully lain before my feet. If I forsake my duty as a keeper at home, I blaspheme the word of God. May we all strive to give our first and best to the work God has given us to accomplish.